1. A SONG FOR THE OPTIMISTS

Blow the last candle out. Let the wax harden
I wish I could stop crying. And I wish that someone still loved me [x2]
Just breathe and focus. How can I when the air is so cold and empty,
That my lungs froze right in my chest.
I'll be honest the silver linings are getting harder and harder to manufacture
And the smiles are so difficult to fake. [x2]
What do I have to do, or who do I have to kill, to get what I want. What I need [x2]
Happiness is an emotion I was born to this world without, nothing pleases me.
And I can never be satiated.
Through this toil I will breed my own distress and destroy my best hopes,
Fuck up the only things that I love.
I watched my aspirations crashing to the ground, on the backs of the angels that I've slain.
But I meant so well, I tried so hard, gave everyting in my soul, to what end, to what end
Desolation, desire, exhale, pass away. [x3]


2. DILATED

Yesterday I forgot to breathe for like the 6th time this week.
Maybe it was the pink cloud strafed sky that changed my mind and brought me back
Seems like every day it's kill or be killed...
With all this anger there is no time to inhale and progress
And catch the smell of something that you once knew.
Have you ever stopped raised your face up to the sun and screamed
Let it out exhale the pain
That strangulates your soul, when will I be free
My lungs take in the fragrance of remorse, what is the cost, am I living,
If you let your lungs fill up with pain then you will drown in your own regret.
My arms feel so numb my heart palpitates missing a beat.
The blood freezing in my veins. the taste of rust in my mouth.
But today I just threw it all away
Though the light burns my eyes I will not be blind,
If you blink you could miss so much. please don't ever close your eyes


3. AIN'T LOVE GRAND

It's so hard to see when your eyes are rolling in the back of your head
It's even harder to speak when everything you say just comes out wrong

Gutted like a pig, all you want is the world to bleed, someone somewhere stole your desire
The pain akin to, being punched in the throat, and stabbed in the chest

You would rather bleed than be without her
Gone are the tender whispers dancing in your ears
Replaced with lackluster memories you cry, your screams play in your empty room

It's so hard to see when your eyes are rolling in the back of your head
It's even harder to speak when everything you say just comes out wrong

Your bed swallows you whole as the days bleed together, torment on the lips
Of a loved one, and if you try hard enough,
You can almost taste her, feel her pass and
Scream, OH GOD WHY ME

You would rather bleed than be without her
Gone are the tender whispers dancing in your ears
Replaced with lackluster memories you cry, your screams play in your empty room

It's so hard to see when your eyes are rolling in the back of your head
It's even harder to speak when everything you say just comes out wrong


4. LIVING EACH DAY LIKE YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD

Raise up the ghosts of the dead - I won't die like them
Push past the point of raw emotion - I will breathe
Exist with a broken spirit - I will die complete
Ignore what the angels say enjoy that special place where the demons speak to me
I won't pick out the lining of my coffin yet unless I am sure that color satin is me
Better yet go with crushed velvet, that way I'll be damn sure to enjoy eternity
My daily life writes the eulogy, engraved on tombstone diaries,
Laid to rest with the passing of time
Seems to me that even love can die
And the rituals, that fade away, and the roses that cease to be laid
And to me it clearly appears that we're already one foot in a very shallow grave
I will love with passion
You live like you're dead
As each day dies, are we living on to the next or passing on in the twilight


5. DEANNE THE ARSONIST

Coward, the next time you want to fuck me over, stab me in the front.
Can I still see my future in your eyes?
I cannot picture myelf, stone dead in your embrace,
And your cruel, crimson smile, kills me quietly.

No one can have their moments free from your withering touch
Fuck off, like your the only one who has ever cried or been broken by love.
Spare me your pity party, drunk off your own misfortunes.
Wallowing in your blissful melancholy.

Can you taste my blood?
You knew that this would kill me,
But you carried on and on, with your selfish shit.
Everyone cared about you. Why couldn't you,
Instead your greed, compelled you, to steal other silver linings?

Burnt down my world, you killed my home.
Spread out the ash and walked away.
How could you just, close off your eyes?
Turn tail and run, you are the greatest coward.

Damn right, I am still pissed.
Next time I see your face we'll see who has the upper hand.
Kiss my fist, taste the floor, tired of your games. Fuck off, goodbye.


6. SOMEONE'S STANDING ON MY CHEST

Starving searching this barren wasteland
Trying to grasp being this alone
Pleading for a breath of fresh air, someone's standing on my chest
Dying I'm asphyxiating myself
Break myself slave to my weakness choke on my words
Oh I'm drowning and I feel so alone
The lights are on and I wish I was home
My lips are screaming pretty nothings
My ears are bleeding for want of words, fuck words I need actions
Hope has left me fucking shattered
Someone's standing on my chest
Alone would be a pleasant change from here
How do you gauge loneliness how you ever felt so alone
It feels like the light will never reach me here,
I am choking back my longing for shed tears
So strangulated by my lonesome fears please don't worry too much,
It only hurts when I breathe


7. AT LEAST I KNOW I'M A SINNER

Lift up a stone and you will find him,
Cherish the beauty in the world around us
Not in buildings or crosses made by man
Judge me, fuck you, stop playing god,
Your forked tongue prophecies,
Carelessly caressing the wounds of the weak
People like you should be crucified,
Then maybe just maybe you would have an idea
Of what you are talking about.
My only solace is that one day,
Judgment will come for the wicked, then we will see who burns
Raise up your head, unclasp your hands,
Your weakness makes me tremble
True strength comes from within
And we were given this life to live,
Not exist under standards, set by some bullshit rule book
What prayers of yours, were ever answered, by degrading others
Spare me your biblical back peddling nonsense
For the people that you've hurt, and the being your dishonor,
Your fall from grace, will finally justify my means
Judge me and now you are me and what's worse
You are now a traitor to your god
Tell me Judas, how does it feel to be looked down upon
Sinners like you, should be stung up from the highest tree
You judged me and now you are me, stop playing god


8. TULIPS ARE BETTER

Crystal clear I see the rose is frail,
The thorns hid easily in its beauty, as I go to grasp it in my hand
My heart is torn beating from my chest
Let me be captivated, by your beauty
Then let me fall from your grace, unto my broken knees
Close my eyes so tightly, the tears are welling up
You aren't worth the waste, of the salt or the water
Fuck all your false beauty, it was transparent just like your smile - liar
Your thorns caress my flesh, crimson drops on a snowy field - liar
I have watched you retrogress, I have watched what you've become - liar
Please take your eyes off of me,
it's funny how fast blue eyes fade gray - liar
And you are deceit
Watching the sun play in your hair
I couldn't really care, care any less about you
Just wither away real beauty is forever in you
Just wither away


9. A VAMPIRE'S LAMENTS

I am the walking dead heartbreaker, my apologies,
I'm happy you'll never understand what
It's like to be trapped under six feet of solid glass,
I can see out, but no one gets in
Screaming at this prison, I've locked myself into,
I'm sorry that I'm still breathing and that I'll
Kill again. But the loneliness is too much for me to handle.
But the taste for fresh blood, pushes me on.
The strength of not forgiving
I told myself the constant pain would ease the tension burning inside
But the nights were cold and the days dragged to weeks,
I will die here alone I will die
The fear of romance
The pain of living
The joy of sorrow
The strength of not forgiving
God help me, I'm so tired,
But in my dreams the wolves eat out my soul
God help me, I'm so frightened,
But in my dreams wolves tear out my heart
I used to be golden, a saint in a time of sorrow,
But then the turning came and I kissed
The sun goodbye, don't you get it,
it's always darker in my eyes, the screams of my brothers
Egging me on


10. LIP GLOSS AND BLACK

If I gave you pretty enough words.
Could you paint a picture of us that works.
An emphasis on function rather than design.
aren't you tired cause I will carry you, on a broken back
And blown out knees, I have been where you are for a while..
Aren't you tired of being weak?
Such rage that you could scream. All the stars right out of the sky
And destroy the prettiest starry night. every evening that I die.
I am exhumed just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold. [x3]
I am exhumed.. just a little less human....
So much more bitter and cold... [repeating]
After all these images of pain, have cut right thru you,
I will kiss every scar, and weep you are not alone...
Then I'll show you that place in my chest where my heart still tries to beat.
aren't you tired of being weak?
Such rage that you could scream. All the stars right out of the sky
And destroy the prettiest starry night. every evening that I die
Live love burn die