1. FAMILY TRADITION

I try to be the one that everybody loves
Where has that gotten me?
I tear myself to shreds to prove that I'm someone
That I could never be
Now these unsightly marks define me

So help me
Please someone come quick
I think I am losing it
Forgive me I inherited this
From a stranger I'll never miss
I'm sick

My father taught me firsthand how to be set free
Give up and run away
I wish I could drain out his half of blood in me
But I'd still have his face
I curse reflections everyday

So help me
Please someone come quick
I think I am losing it
Forgive me I inherited this
From a stranger I'll never miss

Here is my own family tradition
Following footsteps into addiction
So is there a way
That I can find peace while still numbing my pain?
Is this my fate?
Cause your only son still can't seem to find his way

So help me
Please someone come quick
I think I am losing it
Forgive me I inherited this
From a stranger I'll never miss

So father where the hell are you now?
I think that you would be proud
Your son, who so unluckily
Fell right next to the tree

I hope you're proud of me
I hope you're proud...


2. WOLVES AT THE DOOR

Last night I found heaven
It was on the tip of my tongue
And it reminded me of
All the times I was young

Of catching rain in my open mouth
I used to smile 'til the day I found out
I have no idea who the hell I've become
It's not who I was, it's not who I loved

I wanna drown, in a sea filled with Novocaine
I wanna burn, on a beach where the sand
Has thousands of needles poking at my skin

I lie in bed to the sound
Of the wolves at my door
They are speaking in tongues
Holding court on my floor

I never thought it would come to this
I'm more yellow than my own piss
They're making rounds just to even the score
"Just open the door." "Just open the door."

I wanna drown, in a sea filled with Novocaine
I wanna burn, on a beach where the sand
Is littered with razor blades
Littered with razor blades
Blades, littered with razor blades

I can't hold on, the path is clear
I can't ignore what's been building for years
There's wolves at the door, I won't hide here in fear
Wolves at the door

I look at myself and the things that I've done
Step away from the mirror and into the sun
I forgive myself for all of my mistakes
When will I learn? When will I, when will I burn?

I wanna drown, in a sea filled with Novocaine
I wanna burn, on a beach where the sand
Is littered with razor blades

I gave up on myself a long time ago
The black clouds they swallowed and spit me out whole
"Sometimes I feel like I'm losing my soul,
At least that means I still have a soul left to lose."


3. LIFE IS NOT A WAITING ROOM

I stand alone on the verge of 24
I can not doubt, I'm left unsure
Everyone I know has a casket made
The plots picked out, the roads are paved

Do I still have time to make mistakes?
Is this the point where I bend or break?
Am I too far gone to medicate?
Is this a birth or is this a wake?

There was a part of me
That I lost when I was seventeen
I can't get back
The innocence I gave to scenes
In between Jersey plays
Was just an act

I would slit my throat and blinded through my lies
Desperate I am matched with two black eyes
At the mouth of a river people sit
With concrete shoes ready to jump in

Do I still have time to chase my dreams?
Or did that pass, sail out and leave?
Is there still room for me to grow?
Or is this feud all that I know?

There was a part of me
That I lost when I was seventeen
I can't get back
The innocence I gave to scenes
In between Jersey plays
Was just an act

Sometimes I want, to just give in
Accept the answers without a question
It's easier, I must confess
To treat this life like it's a waiting room for death
How can I make sense of this mess?
I'll share my emptiness with a glass
It's my best bet for happiness

There was a part of me
That I lost when I was seventeen
I can't get back
The innocence I gave to scenes
In between Jersey plays
Was just an act

There was a part of me
That I lost when I was seventeen
I can't get back
The innocence I gave to scenes
In between Jersey plays
Was just an act