1. ALL I WANT FOR X-MAS IS COBIE SMULDERS TWO FRONT TEETH (KNOCKED OUT)

Witch, witch, witch, witch, witch, witch, witch


2. LIFE VS. TOYS R US KIDS (THE REMATCH)

The true spirit of Christmas is the suffering of mankind
Because Christianity is all about the suffering of mankind
So we cause others suffering to alleviate our own
And we're all left feeling empty in the end
Give of yourselves so no one will guilt trip you for not doing so
Preach love and charity to make yourself feel noble and righteous
Preach righteousness to bring down those who still enjoy this time of year
And to make yourself feel better about the unknown answers after death
Anyone older than 17 understands
Misery is the true spirit
Misery is the true spirit
Anyone older than 17 understands this all too well