1. VIOLET (INTRO)

Why? What have they done?
Who has the culprit crossed and forced in another year?
Why have some gone, but we are still here?

Sitting in a circle of clouds. Enforced.
Upon my head. Above my eager eyes.

Misplaced. My mind abandoned. Seized to substance.
Abused in months of excess. Heat flashes of memory.
Breathing in good health. To stop the nightly excess.
Pounding on the walls of the temple. Beside the cross.
Bury me in the bay. Tempt me with throated swords no longer.

Oh, I am weary. I am tired. Tired of leaping.
Collections of caskets. I am lurking death.

AN ANIMAL. A curse to myself.
Harms way for those I cherish.

Done. Forced in light.

Versed, as the child, on and on.
I am home.

I am home.


2. LIBERTINE DISSOLVES

I married into the fly trap
I sunk into suburban sand
Victimized by restlessness
Blacking out in the lion's mouth.
I laughed at the cigarette stain;
inhaling black on the blinds
And cried at the digital bulb blasts on the frames of my memory
I am transparent.
Denied, segregate from the obvious.
Drunk and despairing--sick.
"I loved a girl I'll never speak to again. I spoke to a girl I never stopped loving".


3. UNREQUITED

Bowing to a monolith of grief. Obsessing over discord.
Daydreaming of nights that led my staggering steps to nowhere.
Bathing in the Summer night’s cold and in the black of night, I feel so old.
I feel so worn, quartered, and torn. Hung from the post where my brothers once sung.
Cut from the tie where my sanity binds. Stuck in Winter’s Hell, with just you in mind.

Waiting in the cold, where we hide behind.
I can’t move on, because I can’t shed the weight of myself.
There is no such thing as the past, present, or future.
There just is, and it never goes away.

I thought about you for the rest of the day.
Catching my head turning to find you again.
I hated myself for it.


4. LANGUAGE GAMES

We're still laughing over lore.
Still talking about a stream of smoke in the head of a shelter tank, swimmingly bored.
Swimming in monotony. Swimming in ponds where our knees scrape the bottom
And still, we swallow the surface.

We brought our boredom to the lights.
Spoiled the city. Blind to the ocean. Deaf to the heavens.
Carving a shut in symphony with memory's masturbation.

I've talked it out.
Doomed to be a spoiled child.
A pupil in the eyes of forever.
I knit the fire. I stared into the mirror.
A prisoner to the past. A ghost to the present.

Put down your glass. Don't raise a toast to your slaving bloodline now.
Come to life. Walk the roads to judah, tonight.


5. EXIT:DENIED

Choked whines filter through the crack in the window
where the sun fell through moments ago.
And in this hour, the seas blows in the cataracts of his final day.
His blessed concussed confusion.
His seizing airways.
He holds his head wishing for his mother.
He takes to the cold.
Where has the child gone?
I thought he was anchored to his texts?
His revered studies?
He grew tired of the distant solar systems
and stopped counting his nightly collection of clouds.
He smudged the blood of his lover.
"We are never apart. Maybe in distance, but never in heart."