1. DAS FELCHUS

I don't wanna shave my palms
I don't need no enema
I just wanna ride your bum
And then commence to suck the cum

I'm gonna bend you over you slut
I'm gonna ram it up your butt
I'm gonna pound you 'til you squelch
Come on people, do the Felch!

Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!

Gonna ride the highway high
Gonna ram you 'til it's dry
Gonna bust you wit my wong
Fuck and felch you all night long

I'm gonna bend you over you slut
I'm gonna ram it up your butt
I'm gonna suck you 'til I belch
Come on fuckers, do the Felch!

Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!
Das Felch!


2. LIZARD FROM GHOST MOUNTAIN

I. Lizard Lurking

Serpentine munster is waiting for you
No, you can’t see him but he can see you

While you’re a-sleeping, he’ll come a-creeping
Chomp off your nose and shit on your toes…

Oh…but there’s so much more!

II. Impending Doom

Don’t stray from the camp, Johnny
You know the rumor well
Don’t stray far from Mommy and Daddy
Or you’ll be damned to lizard hell!

He’ll find you alone, clamp down on your bones
Drink your blood from a ghoulish fountain
He’s the lizard of death, the reptilian one
He's THE LIZARD FROM GHOST MOUNTAIN!

III. A Poem

Evil is waiting for you, boy
Don't get lost, you know it brings him joy
If you go a-fishin', you'lll soon be a-wishin'
Your cadavers weren't in that beastie's jaws
Doin' an awful mean squishin'!

IV: The Trek (Gone Fishin’)

I’m just a stupid white kid from town
Hopin’ this lizard don’t run me down
So when I find me a hole where I can cast my pole
I’m gonna catch me a fish and mow down…YEAH

And now I'm eating my fish!

V: The Cave

The clouds have come
I'll need to find a place to stay dry
I see nothing, but wait…
Something’s caught my eye!

A cave!
A cave!
A cave!
A cave…

Darkness…has fallen
It seems as though I’m fucked
I’m lost in the forest in the mountains of doom
Where he lives…and stalks...
The terrified victims of GHOST MOUNTAIN!

Well time’s running out
I’ve got to choose
It’s the cave or pneumonia
What’ve I got to lose?

So it’s off to the cave
Not a minute to waste
In a minute, I’ll be dry…

And safe?!?

VI: 9:15 - The Lizard Hour

BONES!! BONES!! HUMAN BONES!!!

Well what did you expect?
A lizard’s gotta eat, right? Right!

There’s no need to stare
Just pull up a chair
Don’t be afraid of my teeth

Why in ten seconds flat
(And you think about that)
I’ll roll us up a great big SPLEEF!

VII: Stoned Again

And so the friendship began
Harmony through drugs
Boy and Lizard smoked more and more dope
While the Lizard ate bugs

Oooh-aah, Flower Lizard
Oooh-aah, stoned again!

VIII: Lizard Lunch

Ooh, I shoulda known better
Than to do these drugs with a guest
Happens every time cuz the dope I get’s the very best

Cos' you see as you’s lookin’ at me
My joints is laced with PCP
For me, that’s good.
For you, that’s bad.

For now I feel my hunger grow
I got’s to eat ya, don’t ya know?
It’s lizard instinct, right down to my pud
I’m afraid I got’s to taste your blood…

JOHNNY’S DEAD…!