1. A REQUIEM TO ME

(Instrumental)


2. CHOICE ?

What did I do
That I had to choose
Between two lovers?

Why did I choose
Knowing I'd lose
Affections thereof?

Is this my choice?

Who had made you
Fell all was through
With my choice hereof?

When did you know
That you would go
If I choose above?

Where would one be
Without life's tree
And his holy dove?


3. STRUGGLING WITH DEPRESSION & SUICIDE

Days of endless struggle.
More hopeful pills today.
Trying to appear “normal”
In some sort of way.

It seems that the struggle
Is always here with me.
And I wouldn’t be here now
If guilt would leave me be.

I know there’s been many
Who’ve had worse than I,
But that doesn’t always mean
That I wouldn’t say “good-bye”.

People say I have a lot going for me.
I’m sorry, but I just can’t see.
I can’t see because my worst enemy
it’s not my life, but inside of me.

Always on a roller coaster,
Not much consistency
I’m nothing if I’m not up or down.
I’m nothing if just “me”.

Very little energy.
Wanting to stay in bed,
Wishing to be enthusiastic
Instead of feeling like I’m made of lead.

Wanting to be excited.
Wanting to care for more,
But when nothing makes sense,
It’s hard to focus on the poor.

Cluttered mind, cluttered thinking.
It’s hard to keep in touch
With what is happening around me
And not to worry too much.

I feel that everybody is better than me
And I can’t do anything right.
This is how i’ve felt my whole dang life.
It didn’t just start last night.

No confidence, no self-esteem.
Everybody else is right.
To speel my mind is to be a fool
So I just try to “sit-tight”.

Any one of these problems
Would be a very vice.
But when you have them all,
Living seems like a roll of a dice.


4. INTERMEZZO

(Instrumental)


5. I'M CRYING (TEARS OF SOLITUDE)

(Instrumental)


6. KILLED BY LIFE

It is in these moments of pain
When I understand that my existence is futile
And that this has tormented me since birth
Making me believe that someone needed me.

This is the truth...

You, life, made me suffer for too long.
Now I'm over. I'm over forever.
The lesions that you left on me are too serious
To be left open by you.

One last time I cry bitter tears
One last time I suffer because of you
One last time I close in myself
One last time I take conscience of what I will do

The feeling of the blade that cuts my skin
Is better than what you made me feel.
The times you betrayed me are infinite
And you made me feel sick, deluding myself.