1. S.O.S

Stagecoach lady, hourglass body
Makin' things glow in the night
Well, she would if she could
And she'd be good if she would
Only tell her lover she'd be out tonight

Cause I'm a bad
A lonely school boy
And I'm a rat
And it's too bad
Can't get me none of that

Salt Lake City, salt-lickin' bitties
Bogies turn, stinkin' of gin
Well my daddy was hard
His face was pretty scarred
From kickin' ass to playin' poker to win

Cause I'm a bad
A lonely school boy
And I'm a rat
And it's too bad
Can't get me none of that
It's too bad

It's too bad
Can't get me none of that

New sold lady
My mama Cady
Chivalry was born at her feet
Well she should have thought twice
When pa showed his dice
Imagine puttin' my daddy to sleep

Cause I'm a bad
A lonely school boy
And I'm a rat
And it's too bad
Can't get me none of that

It's too bad
Lord, it's too bad
I said it's too bad
Lord, it's too bad
I said It's too bad
It's too bad
You know it's too bad
It's too bad


2. LORD OF THE THIGHS

Down to who knows who, just to socialize.
I'm waiting for my girls, when you call my eyes.
You got no way to make a man honey,
You got to understand.
I'm your man, child. Lord of the Thighs.

Well, well, Lordie my God,
What do we got here?
She's flashin' 'cross the floor,
Make it perfectly clear.
You're the bait, and you're the hook,
Someone 'bound to take a look.
I'm your man, child. Lord of the Thighs.

You must of come here to find it,
You've got the look in your eyes.
Although you really don't mind it -
I am the Lord of your Thighs!

You must of come here to find it baby,
You've got the look in your eyes.
Although you really don't mind it -
I am the Lord of your Thighs!