Aphasia : Seclusion

Metalcore / USA
(2017 - Self-Released)
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Lyrics


1. INDULGENCE

It's not easy to continue on this path when everyone is nothing but a hurdle, in my way
I chose this life, I chose my way, I know my struggles... and will, choose my destiny

It's not easy to continue on this path when everyone is nothing but a hurdle, in my way
I chose this life, I chose my way, I know my struggles... and will, choose my destiny

All of these years, all of these tears, I can see so clear
All of this time, all of my insides... I must focus my mind

I can see through the hate, I can see the friction, start to dissapate
I can move on, I can break free, I will use this to motivate

And when I'm feeling down
And when I'm feeling so drowned
I will not feed your indulgence

And when I'm feeling down
And when I'm feeling so drowned
I will not feed your indulgence

I can see through the hate, I can see the friction, start to dissapate
I can move on, I can break free, I will use this to motivate

I'll remember not to feed your indulgence
I'm better off without you and your involvement
I'll remember not to feed your indulgence
I'm better off without you and your involvement
Ruh

Remember me clearer
Look at yourself in the fucking mirror
And when I'm passing through
I'll come back and forever haunt you


2. DISMAL

I'm just floating here
Going through the everyday, motions
Levitating through time
My emotions running wild
We've drifted so far apart

I've lived through every single night, every single fucking day.
I've lived through my entire life with a feeling of dismay
But when I close my eyes
I only see your... face

So someone please help me
To feel, I have a place today
Someone please help me
Someone please help me
To find a purpose
Someone to look at me with hope again
To look at me and just pretend

Someone to be my friend

I'm fading away
Once you forget me I'll slowly fade
Into the dark
You let me go
You let me sink to the back of your memory

I'm fading away
Let me be
Just let me go
Just let me sink
To the back of your
Memory...

I've lived through every single night, every single fucking day.
I've lived through my entire life with a feeling of dismay
But when I close my eyes
I only see your face

I only see your face

So someone please help me
To feel I have a place today
Someone please help me
Someone please help me
To find a purpose
Someone to look at me with hope again
To look at me and just pretend

I'm not whole
I'm not myself any more
I'm not whole
I'm not the man I was before

Going through the everyday, motions
Levitating through time
My emotions running wild
We've drifted so far apart


3. DIRECTIONS

I am, asking in volumes
I am, straying and confused
Lost in, a world of the silenced,
Falling short, with voices of the abused

Why do, we only come together
In times of despair?
Why do, I only get an answer
When I’m in need of repair?

I’ve been reaching in every direction
I’ve been shouting with every inflection
I’ve been reaching in every direction
Bleeding with imperfection

I can feel the pity leaking from within
I can feel them prey on my sadness and binge
Leaching on my emotions
And sucking me dry
You've made me hollow
My body and my mind

Have begun to divide.

I feel you
You heal me
But then you strayed from me
I felt you
You healed me
But left too early

(I have nothing left)
(I have nothing left)
I have nothing left
I have nothing left to give
I am but a shell of a man
Left for worthless, and no one understands

My body and mind
Have begun to divide

I feel you
You heal me
But then you strayed from me
I felt you
You healed me
But left too early

I feel you
I feel you (x3)

I felt you
I felt you (x3)

I felt you touch me
I felt you care and I believed
I felt your heart beat
I felt it sync with me
And when you left me
I tried to be strong
But my insides fell apart

(I feel you)
I felt you touch me
I felt you care and I believed
I felt your heart beat
I felt it sync with me
(I felt you)
And when you left me
I tried to be strong
But my insides fell apart

My body and my mind
Have begun to divide


4. DIVISION

Staring through a broken glass
No hope for a future, worn down by the past
So many lost but I begin to see
What I really lost, was only me

Lonely ghost, can you see?
See what's become of me...
Come back to me
Come back, come back
So quickly we drifted away

No one
Told me growing up meant
Growing apart
From all of the ones
I knew from the start
Now, divided in two
Their teeth still bear remains of you

Lonely ghost, can you see?
See what's become of me...
Come back to me
Come back, come back
So quickly we drifted away


5. COMPLACENCE

When this all began, I could look at you and I could call you my friend
But I was fooled, I was cheated, I was lied to, all you ever did was pretend

Now I look at and you and can’t believe what I see

We built this up together, we built it up ourselves
But one year later, you’ve shown me how you really felt
We put it all together, piece by piece
All of this time, and you decide to leave

When you see me, and when you see us all succeed
Will you still believe, will you still believe? (Will you still believe)
Will you see me, will you still believe your choice to run away (Choice to run away)
Will you still believe, will you still believe? (Will you still believe)

Betrayer
A liar and a cheat
You ripped the ground right out from underneath our fucking feet
Bearing two faces
Seeking forgiveness for your own complacence
You told us you were fine
you left us all behind

Seeking
Forgiveness
For your own complacence
You gave in, to your own temptations

When you see me, and when you see us all succeed
Will you still believe, will you still believe? (Will you still believe)
Will you see me, will you still believe your choice to run away (Choice to run away)
Will you still believe, will you still believe? (Will you still believe)

I’ve never felt like such a fool before
Never again will you test
How much I can endure
How much I can endure

When this all began, I could look at you and I could call you my friend
But I was fooled, I was cheated, all you did was pretend


6. SECLUSION

Who am I?
Looking for answers but I keep crawling back into my head
Constantly growing apart from the world that surrounds me
Forever alone
Just as I always expected
Who am I?

How long can I look up to the sky
Until I decide to keep everything inside
No need to confide
Taking the lonely path, has always seemed to work for me
Been alone this long, no reason for change

Never thought, that you'd move so soon
I never saw you running in directions away from me, but without you where would I be?
Never thought I'd lose you, I've been pushed and pulled, torn and sewn
Will I ever find hope again?
Hope again...

Never felt so torn before
Never felt so unsure
Forever left here to endure
I've never felt so insecure

What am I? But a doll to the world, someone used to embrace me, now I'm forgotten
There is nothing left of me to consume, I am the definition of introversion
Just leave me be, I don't want you to understand
Just leave me be, you'll never comprehend
I never needed a friend
Just leave me be

Never thought, that you'd move so soon
I never saw you running in directions away from me, but without you where would I be?
Never thought I'd lose you, I've been pushed and pulled, torn and sewn
Will I ever find hope again?
Hope again...

Never felt so torn before
Never felt so unsure
Forever left here to endore
I've never felt so insecure

Been trying for so long
To be strong
But every time I stand up
I forget where I belong

Peel me back from the surface
Bathed in self-doubt
My feelings tossed about

There is nothing left
But loneliness for me
Seclusion is my destiny


7. LINGER

I'm staring at the stars, lost in thought, and distraught
I'm staring at this wall, looking into every distant plot
I'm feeling the dark side of meaning
I'm feeling the madness inside of me

You lay here dormant in the back of my head
I'm all alone, but wish you were here instead
Your memory plays, again and again
A constant reminder, of when I want to pretend

And even when you are so far away
I look into my thoughts, my memory

You are just a memory but...
This lingering feeling is consuming me...
Consuming me...

My thoughts are crippling
I can't break away
It's driving me insane
I wish I could forget
We'd ever met
Is this a test?
The way you linger...

I see you often but briefly, in my sleep
But when I wake my thoughts, often feel misplaced
I saw you when I closed my eyes
But when I open them my dreams always end

Every time
I think I'm a step ahead
I'm blind
I'm falling behind instead

Every time
That I feel fine inside
I'm blind
I'm broken and cannot hide

You are just a memory but...
This lingering feeling is consuming me...
Consuming me...

My thoughts are closing in
I cannot break away
It's driving me insane
Wishing that I could forget
That we'd ever met
Is this a test?
Oh how you linger
Oh how you linger

My thoughts are closing in
I cannot break away
It's driving me insane
Wishing that I could forget
That we'd ever met
Is this a test?
Oh how you linger
Oh how you linger

Every time
I think I'm a step ahead
I'm blind
I fall behind instead

Every time
I feel fine inside
You always linger
You always linger
Every time
I feel fine inside
You always linger
You always linger

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