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Band Name Hello Kitty Suicide Club
Album Name ^_^
Type Album
Released date 28 February 2012
Labels Self-Released
Music StyleGrind Electro
Members owning this album2


1. Safety Scissor Death Squad
2. Black Man Lego Rape
3. Roots MMORPG
4. Tamagotchi Cannibalism
5. Lincoln Log Holocaust
6. You Show Me a Pile of Dead Hookers and I'll Show You a Beanbag Chair
7. Choking on Cupcakes Isn't As Cool As It Sounds
8. Smashing Babies with Rocks
9. Charizard Uses Flamethrower Up Blastoise's Vagina
10. Untitled
11. Mr. Game & Watch Is a Mass Murderer
12. Kittens Pooping Out Rainbows and Razorblades
13. My Heart Is Violated by 1,000 Tears
14. Wigglytuff Softball Championship
15. Black As Night, Cold As Ice
16. Paris Hilton Jihad
17. Escape to Sugoi Mountain
18. Crucifying Ganguro Girls to a Lisa Frank Cross
19. We Played N64 and I Cried on Your Lap
20. Crying 8-bit Crystal Tears
21. Life Commitment to My Pokewalker
22. Gimme Your GP or I'll Take Your HP

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Hello Kitty Suicide Club

Review @ dat_g0rilla_dick_daddy

07 February 2021

A hidden gem amongst the turd of mediocrity

This band gets alotta shit from plebs for not being considered music, at least that is what they argue, I'm here to tell you that they are wrong. This album I'd argue is too deep for 99% of the population because they are too stupid and too myopic to understand metal music played with digital instrumentation, or rather VSTs. You see on the comment sections concerning any band that ever deigned to use drum programming, a slew of low IQ, mouth breathing troglodytes cry about how "it's not real" or "it's not organic" or "it's all digital" while they almost solely listen to music via streaming or download and own very few physical formats of music. How ironic, a band that doesn't use acoustic drums is "not real" or "not organic" or "has no soul" yet they never listen to music on a physical medium or recorded in analog or that hasn't been remastered digitally already. I believe the source of all these arguments stems from the fact that they themselves are "not real" nor "organic" nor "have a soul" so they project that onto innocent musicians whom are smart enough to use new and innovative technology to create and compose art in a non-antiquated and outdated manner, which the self-proclaimed "critic" is too low IQ to utilize himself let alone make a song in the first place. Now that we established how faulty and hypocritical these detractors' logic is, let's talk about the music itself. If you weren't a low IQ troglodyte, you would realize that the compositions are quite similar to a band like say Dillenger Escape Plan or Converge which ironically these aforementioned low IQ troglodytes love because they use acoustic drums with drum triggers but the low IQ trog is too tone-deaf to notice obviously glaring details like that despite claiming otherwise. The vocals express great emotional anguish and turmoil yet these low IQ trogs say it sounds like a 12-year-old getting raped which ironically proves my argument more than theirs. A 12-year-old getting raped is very emotionally anguishing and turmoil-inducing which complements the chaotic, spastic nature of the music but the average Opeth fan would not understand how composition and tonality works. They assume that composition should be repetitive, fascistic, and structured like a propaganda piece and they suffer a complete meltdown if a piece of music does not conform to that standard, which this album does not conform to. They believe tonality should be bland, not vibrant nor dynamic, which is why they think a band like Tool is so "interesting" and "intriguing" because they challenge this preconceived notion similar to how a chihuahua challenges a larger breed of dog, which is not much of a challenge in the first place. Hello Kitty Suicide Club legitimately poses a threat to this narrow-minded standard and every low IQ troglodyte loses their mind. In conclusion, this album is a complete revolt against the low IQ troglodyte that cannot challenge their myopic mindset on music and the universal hatred of this album more or less proves it. If you listen to Opeth or think Tool are experimental then you would not understand the brilliance of this album but if you listen to music more challenging than those two bands, there might be hope for you. This album proves that we live in the movie Idiocracy and that anybody who likes this album should not participate in the affairs of this cruel and irreversibly mindless world.

1 Comment

2 Like

corpsebunder50 - 26 October 2022:

Next step for the metal history! Thanx for the chronic ;)

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