Discussions about Music >> Reviewing School
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InfinityZero
Saturday 08 January 2011 - 21:33:48
Jeez, no one is coming on this thread except me, miniradman, and Enigmatick.
I might start putting up album reviews on youtube, I dunno.
What do you guys think?

miniradman
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 02:23:41

citation :
Enigmatick says :

citation :
miniradman says :

The oddest thing is, that people who like my reviews mainly like my uniform stucture and the usually take my advice on what genre they are. In saying that, I think that stating running time and length of a couple of songs is apropiet and does have an affect on the listener. Also if there was an album with 15 tracks and an album with 9... which one would you get? so in short, some readers do care. Just because you don't doesn't mean that others don't.  

 
ok hmmm? Ok I think that you really shouldn't put language like Blows Goat dick in your reviews. I know metal archives is fairly strict when it comes to their reviews but is that sort of language really nessessary?
 
Also you tend to give too much unwanted detail. For example "And then a band like Die Apokalyptischen Reiter comes along and blows my genitals off, leaves my Head throbbing and neck sore, and reminds me what heavy fucking metal is all about. Holy shit, these guys have BALLS." or "It lacks any kind of Power, Charisma, or any kind of quality other than being REALLY FUCKING WHINY".
but... I guess it works.
 
Also you tend to bash things a little too hard. Rather than giving enough reasons, you do 1 line and then spend the next 3 bashing that aspect. Ive been in trouble for bashing Carnifex's Dead in My Arms album and I didn't even know what I wrote that was that bad?
 
I guess you do write decent reviews, but is always sounds like you're on PMS when you write these and  some of your descriptive language may be a little unessessary.
 
I know SoM tollerates some bad grammer and spelling, but I don't think they tollerate excessive bashing.
 
The reviews are pretty good though.



Well, the length of the release could work differently depending on what music the band plays. I don't want to hear an hour-long Grindcore CD because the band usually doesn't have the much material. It all depends on the release and how many Ideas you pack into it. Some CDs are better short, some CDs are better long, and anybody who buys CDs based on how much running time there is is a fucking moron anyways, and you don't want morons reading your reviews do you?

And thank you for the comments, always good to get some feedback, but you're gonna have to elaborate a little more. How is that description "unwanted"? I'd sure as Hell like to know if a band has balls or whether or not a singer's Voice is whiny, as it would probably influence my decision of whether to get the album or not.

And what's wrong with bashing things? I like to tell people whether or not I liked the album, and sometimes the album DOES give me those kinds of feelings. I like to inject emotion into my reviews, and not sound like a robot going BLANK IS A BLANK BAND FROM BLANK THEY PLAY BLANK METAL THAT CONSISTS OF BLANK AND BLANK AND BLANK GET THIS ALBUM IT IS BLANK. Those kind of reviews are a dime a dozen, and I'm trying to add a little originality, and colorful language helps. Why do you think Maddox, George Carlin, Ben "Yathzee" Croshaw and the Angry Video Game Nerd are so popular? because of their colorful language and incessant bashing and the like. It makes the review more entertaining to read.

When you criticize people for their vulgarity, you kind of sound like a really conservative twat. I'm not really sure why it's an issue.

 
You don't have to use discusting words for an entertaining review, take a look at InfiniyZero's. I think his are fairly entertaining to read because of the style of language he uses. He bashes a little with is fine but he doesn't go over the top with it. Also when you say a band has "Balls" what does it even mean? You should use any language that is a little too explicit.
 
Ok I get what you are trying to do to make your reviews easier to read but, you don't have to excessively bash things to make a review entertaining, c'mon thats a little lame.
 
Also I wasen't even criticizing you about your vulgar language, I'm saying it just doesn't seem to be appropriet in this kind of context. Also why do you call me a TWAT? seriously guys, seriously. 

InfinityZero
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 04:50:04
Miniradman, if I said 'you got balls' it Means you have guts; you're gutsy; brave.
When someone says something is ballsy, or it has balls, it Means that it is Brave, bold, and isn't afraid to be different and stand out.
South Park is an example of a TV show with balls.
Iron Maiden was a band that had balls.

miniradman
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 06:27:50
hmmm? I guess.
 
But I wouldn't use that kind of term for reviews.

InfinityZero
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 16:13:35
Well, it depends on the person's diction.

miniradman
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 16:22:56

citation :
InfinityZero says : Well, it depends on the person's diction.

 
It does and it is up to the writer to write whatever the Hell he/she wants. It just seems a little odd to me.

InfinityZero
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 16:42:10
Aaaaaaaaaalrighty then.

Enigmatick
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 17:57:20
It's perfectly appropriate writing, simply because there's no guidelines for reviewing and I can do whatever the Hell I want. There's plenty of reviews where I lay back on the "inappropriate words" as you call them, just take a look at my reviews for, say, Merkuri or Dark Milllennium. Sometimes I go for the Cold, calculated musical description, sometimes I go for the more fun, entertaining read, because, as I said, every album's experience is unique to you. I try to write a fun review when I have a fun experience, I try to write a more "intelligent" review when I have a deep and thought-provoking experience, and I write an angry-as-ass review when I have an angry-as-ass experience.

Oh, and didn't call you a twat, I said you sound like one when you nag about these kind of things, but, hey, if you want to be called a twat, fine by me.

InfinityZero, I've actually been toying with the idea of youtube reviews for a while myself, as every single metal reviewer on youtube I've seen blows ass at it and their reviews basically just consist of telling me whether the album is good or not. Reviewing via videos gets a few of the annoying aspects of written reviews out of the way, so I'd be interested in you letting me know how it goes if that idea does end up taking off for you.

Also, would'ja mind giving me a few pointers on my reviews ATM? I'd like to get some more feedback that doesn't have to do with my twat-knocking dick crushing asslicking muff diving tone of voice.


InfinityZero
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 18:06:04
Well, at the moment I am converting 20 minutes of review into a WMV so I can trim it into a shorter video (I'm trying to go for a 6-minute review; looks like I'm gonna hafta cut a lot out). The file conversion has taken 2 hours now, and it's just about halfway done. Takin forever.
 
Well, my first review is a Negative review, so I can expect a bunch of Negative comments and bashing towards me. It is youtube, after all.
Also I have a lisp so I'm sure I'll get a lot of flack for that. I'll tell you how it goes... if that damn conversion ever finishes.

Enigmatick
Sunday 09 January 2011 - 18:13:47
Don't worry, I doubt you'll get a lot of Negative comments about irrelevant shit like having a lisp and the review being Negative if the content is good.

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