1. EXIST UNDERGROUND

So now you're gonna change everything ?
How expected and unoriginal of you
Now that everything is crumbling and not falling for your words you found the glue asked for not long ago

You're scared
Your existence no longer means what you thought it did
Your body doesn't even accept what comes between your teeth as truth
So hurry up now boy
Start sweeping and gluing
Get to work

Nothing makes those around happier than to see that rabid mask melting onto your face
This isn't a party, this isn't a holiday
Your costume will not come off
I know I can help you
I'm inside you I am you
I laugh as your idiotic mind wanders
And it wanders

You're scared
Your existence no longer means what you thought it did
Your body doesn't even accept what comes out between your teeth as truth
So hurry up now boy
Start sweeping and gluing
Get to work

You're scared well sniff the glue you fuck
You're too late
Nothing will change
This will be a bad dream come true


2. SPARKS IT WILL RAIN

Like the firm decision to bring forth axe to head
I want this winged metal to go down
Unfortunately for the ones I'm with I won't stop wishing, hoping, believing that eventually its weight will bring it down

A small hint of me wants to save the young on board but I know what will happen
The jaded will come tease them with years of no worries only to break it at the neck without warning

Like the firm decision to bring forth axe to head
I want this winged metal to go down
Unfortunately for the ones I'm with I won't stop wishing, hoping, believing that eventually its weight will bring it down

Butterflies nest in my body
As I wait for it to happen I know how my story will end
I've just never had the ground rush at me that fast
I may regret my decision

I've had the same dream over and over
To be forever immortalized body and facial
Like those who lived in Pompeii

Like the firm decision to bring forth axe to head
I want this winged metal to go down
Unfortunately for the ones I'm with I won't stop wishing, hoping, believing that eventually its weight will bring it down


3. CINEMA

Living with a lack of light
Things slip
Things I know very much to be real
In here I feel at rest.
The inside of my eyelids tell me so
They are movie screens

I find comfort in that I've been told I can't remain here
To stay here would be a dream, but that's not what I want to be remembered as
Someone who fell in

We look for the best route
The shortest most accurate
I tend to enjoy the long ones

I find comfort in that I've been told not to remain here.
I shouldn't stay
It's not what mother wants for her cub

I like it here
Where I am I can make up anything

I'm done with these movie screens in my head
They've preoccupied me for long enough

Come now stupid man you've been down there long enough
Let's go do something with the day, you have hours and hours till night comes

Nothing can hurt you in broad daylight
In here I can feel at rest
The inside of my eyelids tell me so
They are movie screens

I find comfort in that I've been told I can't remain here
To stay here would be a dream
But that's not what I want to be remembered as
Someone who fell in

I'm done with these movie screens in my head
They've preoccupied me long enough
Come now stupid man you've been down there long enough
Let's go do something with the day


4. PAMPLEMOUSSE

Look in your hair young love
I have left you a present you will not find unless you look
I have left a part of me there
Don't be surprised when I end up never leaving again
Because of so many pieces of myself I have hidden on you when we say goodbye
One day we won't say goodbye

I know by the trail
But I know now
I know by the trail
That I'll leave behind
That I've left behind

You don't know this but I walk around a grotesque mess when you're far
Missing limbs hidden in your home but I pay no mind, I don't ever feel complete unless I'm where you are

I know by the trail
But I know now I know by the trail
That I'll leave behind
That I've left behind

I can't lie
I miss seeing your feelings for me leak through your eyes
I'm a gross wreck and need my body
And I know just where those pieces sleep

I know by the trail
But I know now
I know by the trail
That I'll leave behind
That I've left behind


5. WHO DOESN'T LOVE A GOOD DISMEMBERMENT ?

At one time when the days were nectar sweet I was a lovely boy.
I brought smiles in my bag to pass around to all the unpleasant I passed.
As life walked by.
I noticed it look at me and not once did it stop its horrible stare.
I made that my occupation, self proclaimed devourer of problems.

It must be a long project to finally bring someone to their knees.
It didn't like me fucking up the balance.
I'm undoing life's work.

Since I never once saw that gaze fade.
My bag became smaller, the unpleasant wouldn't accept my smiles as easily as before.
I think I'm losing my friends.

I noticed it look at me and not once did it stop its horrible stare
I made that my occupation, self proclaimed devourer of problems

I think I was a lovely boy
It feels like a million years since I was him
I noticed it look at me and not once did it stop its horrible stare
I made that my occupation, self proclaimed devourer of problems

To think those stories were a lie and all he had to do was fix a gaze on me
To turn it all around
I think I was a lovely boy
Let's see if we cant make a lovely lovely man


6. ANTARCTICA INSIDE ME

She's a ballerina
She dances circles around me
She tells me what I want to hear
But I'm just never satisfied
I live with a ballerina
I live with a ballerina

Those constant moves
She never stops, she never stops
It's making me nervous
Taunting me on tippy toes
When will my transformation come ?
Those constant moves
She never stops

I sit under rain gathering the courage to do what my mind tells me ?
But I'll just lay around
I've become a joke, a disrespectful being that's been handed all he's ever wanted
But can't find satisfaction
What more could anyone ask for but a smiling blur, a perfect human being
Those constant moves
She never stops she never

I sit under rain gathering the courage to do what my mind tells me ?
But I'll just lay around
I've become a joke, a disrespectful being

She's a ballerina
She dances circles around me
She tells me what I want to hear
But I'm just never satisfied

Making her way through my body
She's a ballerina
Dancing around my head
She tells me what I want to hear
But nothing ever satisfies
Making her way through my body making every organ touched more beautiful than the last


7. WHEN YOU LOSE I LOSE AS WELL

I sometimes wonder about myself
Couldn't I just be making this all up as I go along ?
Though I feel alone at times, shouldn't I feel like I belong ?
I imagine myself to be who I want to be
Though I feel along at time shouldn't I feel like I belong ?
I can hear those trumpets they are playing for me and only me
They are there to remind me I'm alive

I sometimes wonder about myself
Couldn't I just be making this all up as I go along ?
I was born out of nowhere
As if I had been dropped from the sky
My mother the clouds that cushioned me
My sister the flowers I saw on my way down
My brothers cradled me as I laid there alone


8. CELEBRATE THE PYRE

I've lived my life without direction
Holding on to a gift given long ago
Because of this I'll pay for my mistakes the rest of my life

Dragging my body along the black expanse
I can smell the burning trail left behind

I'm not a failure
I'm not alone
As this comes to a close I look back
Hoping to see myself
And it's not because of the blaze I've left
It's possible I've burned everything in my path
I turn back and say because of how you have lived your life you will not find your way again
I look back
Because of how you have lived your life, you will not find your way again

Because of this I'll pay for my mistakes the rest of my life
I'm not a failure
I'm not alone
I've lived my life without direction holding on to a gift given long ago

Dragging my body along the black expanse
I can smell the burning trail I have left behind
I'm not a failure
I'm not alone


9. ARE YOU ANYWHERE ?

Go to sleep, go to sleep
I'm hardly what I make myself out to be
I know what happens when I'm alone
Go to sleep
The cowering and whimpering of a weak-willed son
I've died in every one of my dreams since I was a child

I'm tired of dying
I'll be prepared when it comes
I'm tired of dying
This isn't fun anymore

Go to sleep, go to sleep
The constant confrontation that I protect
Protect myself from every night
Go to sleep
No preparation avails me for what's to come
I've died in every one of my dreams since I was a child

I'm tired of dying
I'll be prepared when it comes
I'm tired of dying
This isn't fun anymore

Now will it be rainbows or knives
This isn't funny anymore

And in the morning the only way to feel accomplished is to be visited by every horrible thought in my mind

I'm tired of dying
This isn't fun anymore
I'm tired of dying
I'll be prepared when it comes


10. MAKESHIFT CLAY YOU

Your last breath escaped while I held you in my arms
Drops fall in the water
Drop as you have from my days
You promised you'd meet me
In the sky when the time was right as a ghost you'll stay at my side

Not able to take my life for fear of rejection into the light
So young am I

Knowing I'll walk till the wrinkles come
Days don't go by where I don't spit wounded letters at time for taking its time

Not able to take my life for fear of rejection into the light
So young am I

Your last breath escaped while I held you in my arms
Counting and counting till our reunion
Still you can't place your hands on my face
Alone alone with spirits and time that takes its time

Not able to take my life for fear of rejection into the light
So young am I


11. WITHOUT YOU AND ONE OTHER I AM NOTHING

Swallow these pearls
They surround the lives of the walking
As they burst in your mouth
Remember to breathe !
They surround the lives of the walking
The ocean drowns the infant inside

If you don't want to see the horses maimed by the waves, lift your arms signal the rocks
Keep your arms up
The vultures will soon be here to carry us home
Yesterday is today
Tomorrow will be our last
What's left ?

Swallow these pearls
They surround the lives of the walking
As they burst in your mouth
Devoured by beak and wing
We agreed we were not afraid to pass on
Remember to breath !

Bubbles of voice whisper they whisper
I'll be proud of you no matter what
Damaging ears like fireworks
Remember to hold your breath
Lack of oxygen invites colors
I'll be proud of you no matter what

What's left ?
Blue giant throats that cry your name till they are considered soul