1. Only Now

Only now… do I see
The light in the window that once warmed me
And kept me secure inside
Has faded and left my life empty
And taken with it my pride
Seems I've become one of the lonely
And destined to play the part
But I'm not one to give up easy
So I'm making my way back to start

Over and over I'm trying to understand
Now that it's over I finally understand

That only now… do I see
I ignored all the signs that were shown me
While you went your separate way
Believing you were right beside me
Believing each word you would say
You used my worst fear as a weapon
And drove it right through my heart
Our promises now lie broken
As I've lost my way

Fed up and tired and so frustrated
Should've known it would end this way
You gave your list of reasons
So I'm backing away backing away
Because I know I know I know
My demons and my crying eyes won't help at all
I guess it's better this way

Head up head out to face the world
No more wasting tears on you
A new road a new beginning
With nothing to lose nothing to lose
Because I know I know I know
My feelings and my broken heart may mend slow
But they'll heal just the same

When I needed you, you were not there
Though I pretended you were
I lied to myself and believed it
Until I was self-assured
When you left I spoke not a word
But then I never knew what to say
And if I did would things be different
Or would you still have turned me away

2. A World Without Heroes

I close my eyes each breath is burning
Yet I shiver from the cold
I listen for voices calling
To give me hope

Thinking back the Earth began to tremble
And then the ground gave way
A wall of thunder fell upon me
Followed by an icy grave

The hours pass seems I've been forgotten
And left for dead
I slip in and out of consciousness
With regrets

A harsh kiss from winter the snow angels are falling
And my worlds grown dark and cold
Suddenly a helping hand reaches for me
At last I knew I wasn't alone

I wouldn't want to live
In a world without heroes
No one to pick me up when I fall

A harsh kiss from winter the snow angels are falling
And my worlds grown dark and cold
Suddenly a helping hand reaches for me
At last I knew I wasn't alone

I wouldn't want to live
In a world without heroes
No one to pick me up when I fall

Let me out

3. The Instigator

I feed you my lies so seriously
I've done it a thousand times
A picture-perfect disguise that screams out trust me
And you do you always do
I just feel the need to stir up trouble
I swear you had it coming

So kind, I smile and await the approaching hours
In time you will know that I'm the instigator
But for now…
No one knows it's me amuse me with your pain

I'm gonna start a war
You better watch your back
I figured I'd start with a little he said she said
I've done this shit before
Relaxed and watched you crack
While you were wondering what the hell just happened

You say they'll never get the best of you again
Fact of the situation is you think you know something
The fact of the situation is you can do nothing

I'm gonna start a war
You better watch your back
I figured I'd start with a little he said she said
I've done this shit before
Relaxed and watched you crack
While you were wondering what the hell just happened

You say they'll never get the best of you again
Fact of the situation is you think you know something
The fact of the situation is you can do nothing

I'm gonna start a war
You better watch your back
I figured I'd start with a little he said she said
I've done this shit before
Relaxed and watched you crack
While you were wondering what the hell just happened

I'm stirring, stirring, stirring yeah

I'm gonna start a war
You better watch your back
So kind, I smile and await the approaching hours
In time you will know that I'm the instigator

4. Pale Horse

(Behold the pale horse.
The man that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him)

We've broken the fourth seal, and created mass confusion
While the evil seize the day, the penitent seek absolution
Strode forth the bringer of destruction
Out of the darkness he rides and may God save your soul

He crept from the darkness
And said
Behold the scenery, that's only found in dreams
The fourth of four riders
As foretold
A quarter of the earth received, decimated by three
Sword plague and famine
Then with a wicked laugh… rode off on his pale horse

Now faced with a conquest, of violence, the fear's overwhelming
An era of judgment, and pestilence, the rider approaches
Witness the end of tribulation
Know only two will survive this night

He crept from the darkness
And said
Behold the scenery, that's only found in dreams
The fourth of four riders
As foretold
A quarter of the earth received, decimated by three
Sword plague and famine
Then with a wicked laugh… rode off on his pale horse

As he rode out of sight
His voice mockingly echoed
Know only two will survive
Then my blood ran cold

He crept from the darkness
And said
Behold the scenery, that's only found in dreams
The fourth of four riders
As foretold
A quarter of the earth received, decimated by three
Sword plague and famine
Then with a wicked laugh… rode off on his pale horse

5. Pity Me

Broken by the cards that life's dealt me
As you can clearly see
I've lost the game again
Now all I beg is for some privacy
An ounce of sympathy
Oh pity me

Once again I've let another down
My intentions were sound
Still they place the blame on me
Now all I beg is for some privacy
An ounce of sympathy
Oh pity me

Time moves slower now
When you've been knocked down
And there is no fight in me
Please just let me sleep
To myself I'll keep
Because I haven't the strength to face the morn

Time moves slower now
When you've been knocked down
And there is no fight in me
Please just let me sleep
To myself I'll keep
Because I haven't the strength to face the morn

Ill at ease, so insecure
I feel weak, can't take anymore
Wonder should I, continue to wage war
Or simply choose not to brave the storm

Now all I beg is for some company
To believe in me
Oh pity me

6. Of Things to Come

Screaming, laughing at your own reflection
Take one good look and tell me what you see
Is that your smiling face in the mirror?

Dying, knowing of the coming rejection
Take another look and tell me how you feel
Is that your crying face in the mirror?

Will you ever learn to look past your pain?
And see life another way
Could you ever learn to look past your pain?
And see life another way

It's hard to breathe when you're
Longing for a soul not battered or torn
A life less cold and aged
And you can't seem to quit
Though you try, but something keeps resisting
Taste defeat in each tear you cry
But your heart keeps fighting

You've never had the perfect life
You've never gotten all you've dreamed of
And you've made mistakes that you've learned from
And as you think of things to come
You realize you're not so young anymore
But still have the strength to face the future
So day by day as the years drift by
After every rain the sun must shine
Remember your past for it speaks true
And see your life from a different view
On those days when nothing's certain
Or those days when nothing's wrong
Whether to hide behind curtains
Or find strength to carry on
Learn to look past your pain
And see life another way
And think of things to come

7. The Witch And The Whisperer

Twilight
The stars begin their dance of night
The sleeper's journey has begun
But this night
The sleeper boards a different flight
Unaware he carries on

Through a wasteland of forgotten scenes
Your guide while the whisperer sleeps

Now the witch controls the dreams
As she pulls your strings
A puppet in her hands
Dancing with each command

All your life, there are memories you hid within
She knows them all
The more you try to escape to a conscious state
She holds strong

First light
Awaken with a pain you somewhat recognize
But it fades away
Quickly try
To remember the events etched in your mind
But they fade away

Through a wasteland of forgotten scenes
Your guide while the whisperer sleeps
Through what seems like an eternity
Your guide while the whisperer sleeps

All your life there are memories you hid within
She knows them all
The more you try to escape to a conscious state
She holds strong

Through a wasteland of forgotten scenes
Your guide while the whisperer sleeps
Through what seems like an eternity
Your guide while the whisperer sleeps

8. To Live A Lie

You claim to know me
But that's only half true
So much you'll never know
The silent warnings
Little things left unnoticed
A quiet violence

I'll never share my pain
The bruises fade away it's my decision to stay
I dare never tell
I smile all is well but my life is a living hell

Read me like a book
Still not even close

Everyday it's the same routine
Stay out of the way and watch each word that I say
A perfect love for all to see
But when lust is all that remains truth and lies are one and the same

Read me like a book
Still not even close

You claim to know me
But that's only half true
So much you'll never know
The silent warnings
Little things left unnoticed
A quiet violence

To live a lie
Is to die one day at a time
For love I'll try
And continue to sacrifice
To live a lie
Is to die one day at a time
For love I'll try
And continue to sacrifice

Back and forth, I swear, I've no more patience to try
I'm losing my mind. I've no more tears to cry
Fear and doubt, I can't count, the number of years that you've stole
I'm praying each day for a life I'll never know

To live a lie
Is to die one day at a time
For love I'll try
And continue to sacrifice

9. Lost

Forgive me darling for I could not speak
My words got lost along the way

Now we're flying in circles
I blindly lead the way
With no direction
Something needs to change

In the dark I'm crawling, lost
Trying to fill the emptiness
In the past I've fallen, lost
But never like this

Isn't it so strange how with time you forget the loss?
Then one day you awake and find you've not
Always searching for someone to ease the pain
Then you realize it never goes away

Forgive me precious for I could not see
My sight got lost along the way

Now we're flying in circles
I blindly lead the way
With no direction
Something needs to change

In the dark I'm crawling, lost
Trying to fill the emptiness
In the past I've fallen, lost
But never like this

Isn't it so strange how with time you forget the loss?
Then one day you awake and find you've not
Always searching for someone to ease the pain
Then you realize it never goes away

Why do I lie?
Why do you cry?
Why do we fight?
Why do we cry?

If your silence means you understand
Then why do I still feel

The need to have the last word
Screaming and still never heard
Find another to ease my pain
Sending you on your way
Still empty inside

I'm flying in circles
I blindly lead the way
With no direction
Some things never change

10. Cup of Sorrow

Searching for some answers
Walking through the rain
Glancing up to the broken sky
I let the water hide my pain
If you give me something to hold on to
That won't fade away
Then you'll see me holding on

When the rain starts to fall
I realize life isn't easy
It's even harder when what you've built has crumbled
And though I must carry on
I know it won't be easy
It's even harder with a cup of sorrow

When the rain starts to fall
I realize life isn't easy
It's even harder when what you've built has crumbled
And though I must carry on
I know it won't be easy
It's even harder with a cup of sorrow

Still searching for the answers
Walking through the rain
You second-guessed all we had
And asked me to do the same
If you give me something to hold on to
That won't fade away
Then you'll see me holding on

Step inside where it's dry
But inside I feel cold
All the dreams that we once had believed
Just don't seem to be important anymore

Trying to clear my mind
The memories still echo
All eyes seem to be focused on me
The only thing they will see is my inequity

Stare at me. I'm a man with no more fears to hide
See through me, I'm a shell without a heart inside
Turn from me, I'm abandoned and I'm mystified
Forget me. I'm not worth your time

Once, my world was clear and whole
But that was yesterday
Now, my world is clouded and torn
And so full of pain

Stare at me. I'm a man with no more fears to hide
See through me, I'm a shell without a heart inside
Turn from me, I'm abandoned and I'm mystified
Forget me. I'm not worth your time

When the rain starts to fall
I realize life isn't easy
It's even harder with a cup of sorrow