Reviewing School
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miniradman
message posted the : Friday 07 January 2011 - 14:31:02

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Here you can show off you reviews and get proper feedback from them rather than the lousy comment system because it is is hard to get people to read your reviews who are not your freinds. Also you can send a link to a review you may have done on any site (like Metal Storm or Metal Archives)
 
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miniradman
message posted the : Friday 07 January 2011 - 14:39:14

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I published all the reviews I have saved on my blog
 
http://miniradman.blogspot.com/p/reviews.html
 
I hope you like them. Please don't bash me beacuse they are predominantly Core genres. Please give me some constuctive criticism.
 
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InfinityZero
message posted the : Friday 07 January 2011 - 18:46:55


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How d'you guys like my review of Abrahadabra?
http://www.spirit-of-metal.com/album-groupe-Dimmu_Borgir-nom_album-Abrahadabra-l-en.html




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miniradman
message posted the : Saturday 08 January 2011 - 05:57:55

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citation :
InfinityZero says : How d'you guys like my review of Abrahadabra?
http://www.spirit-of-metal.com/album-groupe-Dimmu_Borgir-nom_album-Abrahadabra-l-en.html

 
I must say, InfinityZero. You write really good reviews. I really like the kind of language you use. Its a bit hard to explain but here's an example
 
(If you expect TTLY BROOTAL Black Metal, well… come on. The band hasn’t released real Black Metal since Enthrone Darkness Triumphant. They aren’t even trying to reach that audience anymore. They’re trying to reach the Dimmu Borgir audience.) 


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Enigmatick
message posted the : Saturday 08 January 2011 - 07:16:59


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Registered the : 2010-10-26
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InfinityZero, I think most of the review was focused purely on the aesthetic of the album and background information of the band and not enough based on a real description of the music, the composition and flow of it, the feel/texture of it, the more Esoteric description of the music that's open to a little more interpretation and helps give the readers a visual image of the album even more. Also, that review made way too many comparisons to previous albums and talked too much about band members and shit. Those kind of reviews leave somebody who's completely new to the band alienated, because they don't understand the references at all.

I dunno, it just kind of read more like a Wikipedia article on the album that described the various elements of their sound without much elaboration. The foundation of a review without a house, you might say.

miniradman: First of all, your reviews are WAY too formulaic, they almost all follow the same template. Each album's experience is a completely unique experience to you, and for that reason every review shouldn't be squeezed into one universal template or else they end up looking kind of awkward and forced. Also, in general, your sentences don't flow well at all, often jumping from point to point to point without any real cohesion, and it makes it really hard to follow. Oh, and don't prattle on about useless shit either. Readers' don't care whether the album is considered an EP or a full-length by the band or the exact length of a song (again, when you say "2 minutes and 19 seconds" as opposed to "a couple of minutes" it looks a lot more awkward.) or what genre you consider the album to be, so don't randomly spend time pointing it out, and if you must, just kind of weave it into the meat and potatoes of your description- kinda getting back at that whole "cohesiveness thing"

in short, your reviews sound like they were written by a spanish robot then put through google translate into english.

Now, i'm done reviewing reviews, now give me your worst, I know some of the earlier ones are pretty bad, I'm improving: http://metal-archives.com/userreviews.php?id=223370&nickname=RapeTheDead



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miniradman
message posted the : Saturday 08 January 2011 - 08:57:17

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citation :
Enigmatick says :miniradman: First of all, your reviews are WAY too formulaic, they almost all follow the same template. Each album's experience is a completely unique experience to you, and for that reason every review shouldn't be squeezed into one universal template or else they end up looking kind of awkward and forced. Also, in general, your sentences don't flow well at all, often jumping from point to point to point without any real cohesion, and it makes it really hard to follow. Oh, and don't prattle on about useless shit either. Readers' don't care whether the album is considered an EP or a full-length by the band or the exact length of a song (again, when you say "2 minutes and 19 seconds" as opposed to "a couple of minutes" it looks a lot more awkward.) or what genre you consider the album to be, so don't randomly spend time pointing it out, and if you must, just kind of weave it into the meat and potatoes of your description- kinda getting back at that whole "cohesiveness thing"

 
hmmm... I agree with you when you say I jump from point to point, I usually write it and then go back and add other stuff later.
 
The oddest thing is, that people who like my reviews mainly like my uniform stucture and the usually take my advice on what genre they are. In saying that, I think that stating running time and length of a couple of songs is apropiet and does have an affect on the listener. Also if there was an album with 15 tracks and an album with 9... which one would you get? so in short, some readers do care. Just because you don't doesn't mean that others don't.  
 
ok hmmm? Ok I think that you really shouldn't put language like Blows Goat dick in your reviews. I know metal archives is fairly strict when it comes to their reviews but is that sort of language really nessessary?
 
Also you tend to give too much unwanted detail. For example "And then a band like Die Apokalyptischen Reiter comes along and blows my genitals off, leaves my Head throbbing and neck sore, and reminds me what heavy fucking metal is all about. Holy shit, these guys have BALLS." or "It lacks any kind of Power, Charisma, or any kind of quality other than being REALLY FUCKING WHINY".
but... I guess it works.
 
Also you tend to bash things a little too hard. Rather than giving enough reasons, you do 1 line and then spend the next 3 bashing that aspect. Ive been in trouble for bashing Carnifex's Dead in My Arms album and I didn't even know what I wrote that was that bad?
 
I guess you do write decent reviews, but is always sounds like you're on PMS when you write these and  some of your descriptive language may be a little unessessary.
 
I know SoM tollerates some bad grammer and spelling, but I don't think they tollerate excessive bashing.
 
The reviews are pretty good though.




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InfinityZero
message posted the : Saturday 08 January 2011 - 14:57:31


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I can see Enigmatick's point for mine as well.
I dunno, I guess I can't help with albums from bands that have had a history with me, but I'll try to improve on that next time I write a review of a band I know a lot about.
Good point's made; glad someone's telling me this.
 
EDIT: SAW your review for Kataklysm's 'Heaven's Venom'.
Sounds like Kataklysm onderwent the same terrible changes that so many modern metal bands have gone through.




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miniradman
message posted the : Saturday 08 January 2011 - 15:02:43

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citation :
InfinityZero says : I can see Enigmatick's point for mine as well.
I dunno, I guess I can't help with albums from bands that have had a history with me, but I'll try to improve on that next time I write a review of a band I know a lot about.
Good point's made; glad someone's telling me this.

 
I'm not sure if this helps, but I perfer to do reviews on bands I barely know anything about. This gives me a fresh start and there is no previous liking or disliking of the Band.


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InfinityZero
message posted the : Saturday 08 January 2011 - 15:08:45


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I do that too.
Look at some of my reviews: Sunn O)))'s Oracle (rare EP limited to 2000 copies)
Anthennath's Peans of Apostasy (rare EP limited to 500 copies)
Thorn's Alraune (one of the most underground bands I know)
A Mind Confused's Anarchos (very small swedish Black Metal band who broke up right after their debut album)
I review modern newish albums some of the time, but not very often.
In short I guess you could say I review what I take interest in at the time.




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Enigmatick
message posted the : Saturday 08 January 2011 - 19:22:41


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Registered the : 2010-10-26
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citation :
miniradman says :

The oddest thing is, that people who like my reviews mainly like my uniform stucture and the usually take my advice on what genre they are. In saying that, I think that stating running time and length of a couple of songs is apropiet and does have an affect on the listener. Also if there was an album with 15 tracks and an album with 9... which one would you get? so in short, some readers do care. Just because you don't doesn't mean that others don't.  

 
ok hmmm? Ok I think that you really shouldn't put language like Blows Goat dick in your reviews. I know metal archives is fairly strict when it comes to their reviews but is that sort of language really nessessary?
 
Also you tend to give too much unwanted detail. For example "And then a band like Die Apokalyptischen Reiter comes along and blows my genitals off, leaves my Head throbbing and neck sore, and reminds me what heavy fucking metal is all about. Holy shit, these guys have BALLS." or "It lacks any kind of Power, Charisma, or any kind of quality other than being REALLY FUCKING WHINY".
but... I guess it works.
 
Also you tend to bash things a little too hard. Rather than giving enough reasons, you do 1 line and then spend the next 3 bashing that aspect. Ive been in trouble for bashing Carnifex's Dead in My Arms album and I didn't even know what I wrote that was that bad?
 
I guess you do write decent reviews, but is always sounds like you're on PMS when you write these and  some of your descriptive language may be a little unessessary.
 
I know SoM tollerates some bad grammer and spelling, but I don't think they tollerate excessive bashing.
 
The reviews are pretty good though.



Well, the length of the release could work differently depending on what music the band plays. I don't want to hear an hour-long Grindcore CD because the band usually doesn't have the much material. It all depends on the release and how many Ideas you pack into it. Some CDs are better short, some CDs are better long, and anybody who buys CDs based on how much running time there is is a fucking moron anyways, and you don't want morons reading your reviews do you?

And thank you for the comments, always good to get some feedback, but you're gonna have to elaborate a little more. How is that description "unwanted"? I'd sure as Hell like to know if a band has balls or whether or not a singer's Voice is whiny, as it would probably influence my decision of whether to get the album or not.

And what's wrong with bashing things? I like to tell people whether or not I liked the album, and sometimes the album DOES give me those kinds of feelings. I like to inject emotion into my reviews, and not sound like a robot going BLANK IS A BLANK BAND FROM BLANK THEY PLAY BLANK METAL THAT CONSISTS OF BLANK AND BLANK AND BLANK GET THIS ALBUM IT IS BLANK. Those kind of reviews are a dime a dozen, and I'm trying to add a little originality, and colorful language helps. Why do you think Maddox, George Carlin, Ben "Yathzee" Croshaw and the Angry Video Game Nerd are so popular? because of their colorful language and incessant bashing and the like. It makes the review more entertaining to read.

When you criticize people for their vulgarity, you kind of sound like a really conservative twat. I'm not really sure why it's an issue.



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